Thursday, May 6, 2010

In Da Club

...Because we're gonna party like it's my birfday! (Way to rock the early 2000's Fiddy Cent reference, right? Don't hate because I'm so cool. Next on the playlist: Color Me Badd's [with 2 d's!] I Wanna Sexx [with 2 x's!] You Up [with 1 p]. Yeah, cool like that.)

I am 32. I am not old nor am I young. And I am waiting for my husband to get home and unload some presents on me! I am also taking a rare jaunt out of the house, bathed and dressed like a human, for this special occasion. We're going out to dinner! Probably at a greasy spoon or my favorite cafe, but whatever, it's sunny outside and I smell good and it's my damn birthday.

And as for presents...thanks to the timing and proximity of my birthday, it has begun. One birthday present I received in the mail today is a gift card to Babies R Us. Because all I've ever wanted for my own birthday is $100-worth of BPA-free rubber nipples. Dude, don't get me wrong, I'll use the $100 (maybe spread it around a bit more than just the rubber nipples), but maybe send those kinds of gifts on the baby's birthday? I was born 32 years ago, and I'm all set with regard to my teething and potty needs. I guess this marks the assent of the Only-Babies-Get-Presents-Now-So-Lower-Your-Expectations-For Yourself phase of my life.

Then there's Mother's Day. My kind, sensitive, thoughtful husband asked me this week, "So, am I supposed to do something for you on Mother's Day, since you've haven't had the kid yet?" Oh, KB, when you ask like that, I fall in love with you all over again. [swoon] I actually kind of agree that motherhood officially begins when you shove a baby out of your vag*, but I was also kind of hoping for a little sumpin-sumpin in the way of recognition, if for no other reason that the new novelty of it. So I left hints about not having any fresh flowers in the house all week long, and hopefully something botanical and lovely will show up this weekend. I also got a Mother's Day card, my first!, in the mail from a good friend. See, she knows about these things. Maybe I'll make a big deal about it at dinner tonight. Hints will be dropping like my mad rhymes, yo.

*Or somebody's vag, or a surgical crevice in somebody's ute.


jenicini said...

Happy Bday! Enjoy your din-din out with your hubby. Yes, gifts for you are now all about the baby. I too think MD starts when you have something squalling to hold, but I love my baby bag my sis bought me! Hope you get some sweet blooms.

Lisa said...

Happy Birthday Jen! I hope you have a great time out of the house, and enjoy mother's day too. You definitely deserve a little sumpin-sumpin after all you've gone through to be this far on your way to motherhood!

bunny said...

Happy birthday! I hope the gods see fit to give you total relief from any further pregnancy symptoms (or at least the nausea and insomnia) as their present! I hope it was a glorious day and a fun night and that you get boatloads of flowers.

Trinity said...


I hope your night out was relaxing and full of good laughs and yummy nosh! And, yes, KB, FLOWERS FOR MOTHER'S DAY, DUDE. GET ON IT.

'Murgdan' said...

Happy Birthday!!! I thought only boys wanted nipples for their yourself something better than that, definitely!

kmina said...

Happy birthday to you,
Mash tomatoes and stew!
(because you da rhymes master and all that)

I hope the presents will suit your liking and disposition and the flowers will flood your house on this joyous occasion! (And I could have found something even more pompous than that, but we've just met and I so want to make a good first impression.)

hope4joy said...

Happy Birthday!! I hope you have a great night. I think you should get a Mother's Day gift. You worked hard enough for it.

Kelly said...

"Oh, KB, when you ask like that, I fall in love with you all over again. [swoon]"

Love you for this.

Hope you had a great birthday!