Therapy. I know I need it, yet I dread it. I leave every session feeling raw, like I've just ripped a bandaid off an almost-healed wound. But that's the mirage, you see -- it's not really that close to being healed. So, more therapy. I have work to do. Anxiety issues, control issues, post-pregnancy body image issues, identity issues, issues issues. Most of what I want to talk about with my last-of-a-dying-breed-talk-psychotherapist can probably be tossed into the garden-variety-parenting-stress bucket, but I am one of those people who showed up to the party a few drinks in already. Sometimes even the little things, maybe especially the little things, unravel me a bit. I haz coping ishews.
So far, being voluntarily unemployed isn't so bad, really. I took a nap yesterday (!) to make up for the sleep I am not getting at night, courtesy of one 15-pound overlord. Our sleep regression has reached a new high (or is it a low?) with nightly wakings every 1-2 hours for several nights in a row, punctuated by a normal night of sleep with 1 or 2 wakings (acceptable), then lather, rinse, repeat. Last night we began a modified Ferber method. Hate. But have to do it. We let him fuss and cry for a few minutes, checked on him, let it go a few more minutes, checked on him, and did this for close to an hour with 10 minute intervals. We had to repeat it twice last night before he went back to sleep. So, no one is sleeping. I sincerely hope it works itself out with minimal repetition really fucking soon because I don't know which is worse, getting up every 1-2 hours and ending up nursing a baby who demands it only because he knows I'll provide it, or listening to him cry off and on for an hour. Twice. Hate this cry-it-out shit, even though we're taking a very moderate approach. Still. Torture on every front.
On an utterly unrelated note, I am going to my neighbor's daughter's (got that?) bridal shower on Saturday. And (Ripley's!) believe it or not, I have never attended a bridal shower before. Never had one of my own, either. Not my thing. She has a registry, as pointed out on the shower invite, but it's all full of the marital property crap -- colanders, table settings, etc. Is this what she wants for her bridal shower gift, then? Should I go rogue and buy her something unique? I assume some jackhole will probably show up with furry handcuffs as a gag gift or something, although this is a Very Catholic Family, so perhaps not. But I would never. Not unless it could be done anonymously. At any rate, what say you, Bloggy Friends, re: bridal shower gifting? Other than the registry items, was there something you got or gave at a bridal shower that was capital-A-Awesome?