Saturday, July 21, 2012

A Comedy of Errors: Daily Edition

Monday: Neighbors set off massive firework at 10:30pm, waking and scaring the shit out of Jackson. I am up all night (because only "MamaMamaMama!" is allowed) trying to calm him back to sleep. KB and I get no sleep due to this as well as the simmering rage over the neighbors being total asshats.

Tuesday: Around 10pm, the dog begins hacking and heaving like her lung is trying to escape. This continues all night, every 5 minutes, and is accompanied by violent vomiting which I get to clean up every 5 minutes. I stay in the family room with the dog so her hackity-hack doesn't wake the toddler. I think Jackson wakes up anyway and I go in to put him back to sleep, but this week is a blur so that might not have happened. The hacking echoes through the house so KB and I get no sleep.

Wednesday: The vet diagnoses a canine upper respiratory infection, which can run up to a 10-day course. Yay! I drive all over town to find a pharmacy that can fill a prescription for a dog cough suppressant. The only one that has it is in a blocked-off intersection (it's construction season in Michigan, when the orange cones are in full bloom). I follow detours for an hour before figuring out how to get to the place. I am now giving the dog 3 different medications with different routes of administration and dosing schedules, around the clock. I am my own apothecary. KB stays up with the dog, but Jackson wakes up twice and I go in to put him back to sleep again, so KB and I don't sleep.

Thursday: The dog is still hacking but maybe, just maybe, getting better (she can go for a whole hour without a hack! Progress!). The power to Jackson's room mysteriously goes out and I can't flip the circuit breaker to fix it. I call an electrician to come out at an emergency rate because dammit, we have to be able to put Jackson to bed tonight. The electrician finds the problem is our burned out lamppost in the front yard, and gives an estimate for trenching (trenching!) the front yard to fix the underground wiring. It is not cheap. So our decorative lamppost will go dark until next year, I guess. It sure will look stupid at Christmastime with lights wrapped around it and no lantern. The dog is still hacking and I think Jackson probably wakes up again. I have forgotten my own name.

Friday: I wake up from my hour of sleep convinced it's Saturday. The dog is better! Still hacking but rarely. She can sleep in the bedroom with us tonight and we can both sleep in our bed. Success! (We couldn't leave her in the family room alone, because she would whimper [and hack] outside our door all night, so someone had to stay with her out there.) Natch, Jackson wakes up and this time KB insists he will go in, even among a chorus of sobbing "No Dada! MAMA!" Eventually he gets Jackson back to sleep and we get the most sleep we've had all week: maybe 4 hours? I mean, I don't even know what day it is. So. On the plus side, the neighbor (who has been avoiding me all week) has finally come over to apologize for the fireworks. Never again, we wag our fingers proverbially.

Saturday: KB confides there's been a small pool of water in the basement all week and he was afraid to mention it amongst the turmoil. This morning it's a large puddle and it might be coming from the general area of the old furnace. Or it could be coming from the refrigerator that we think is directly above it in the kitchen. This is the fun of it...who knows?!? We call our HVAC guy who, thank sweet fancy Moses, can come out today and check it/repair it. If it's the furnace. And it's possible we're on the hook for a new furnace. Or, he could give it the all clear and we have to mop up the puddle and hope it doesn't turn to flood until we can get a plumber here Monday. The fun never stops!

Sunday: Can't hardly wait!



jenicini said...

Holy cow. Seriously.

bunny said...

Sunday: everyone slept for a million years and it was glorious. I fucking hope. That sounds like pure hell.

(I hope you're at least feeling a little less like death, pregnancy-wise.)

Mina said...

Hmm, so, you're bored outta ya mind, huh? Try scrabble. :-)

Do let KB go in and get Jackson back to sleep, he will cry for mama for some more nights, but then he will get over it and by the time your hands are all tied up with a newborn come this autumn, you will have one less worry. And then mama obsession will be replaced by a dada obsession and you will feel bad and left out. There is always something...