Wednesday, August 22, 2012

You Down With L&D? Yeah You Know Me

We are supposed to be on vacation this week. Then Jackson developed a cold and was up all night with sniveling and coughs, and I developed lower abdominal pain so bad I ended up in L&D to rule out preterm labor. We're both fine. His cold is on the mend and it turns out I am merely so constipated I was diagnosed with a bowel obstruction. When offered an enema, I politely declined and am letting colace work its magic a little more gently. Pregnancy is fucking beautiful.

So I am hanging out around the house organizing baby stuff and making things for Jackson's birthday party. Like more artsy craftsy things to decorate outside, where we hope to have his party (fickle September weather permitting). We might rent a bouncy house. (Dude. There was one at my niece's party last week and Jackson went apeshit for it.) And I made homemade play-dough to give out as party favors. It's so easy, you guys. And cheap. I'll write up the recipe below and you have to promise you'll make some. Seriously, so easy. And edible (though it's a salt lick, so probably not so tasty).

We're resorting to having babysitters come over on the weekends so we can finish clearing out the third bedroom of its office furniture to make it into a nursery. Then there's also basement clean-up and organizing to do, so I can sift through all of Jackson's old stuff and pull out what I need for the new bambino. My sister is coming for a whole week (lord help me) since she is soon going to be unemployed and is not trying very hard to find more work (apparently there are no jobs whatsoever in the entire metro Chicago area that meet her extremely specific requirements and she is a little too psyched about a 3-month severance package and unemployment benefits -- I don't know how a hypochondriac can stare down the barrel of affording/losing shitty COBRA coverage, either). She wants to use part of her "break" to come here and help out. So I'm putting her to work. She can help assemble the new crib and hang pictures on the wall. And chase Jackson around the park and spot for him when he's scaling the slide like a freerunner, since I can't anymore. KB will be out of town on a Vegas trip with his friends while my sister is visiting, so the timing is all convenient, at least. I have no idea what I will feed her while she's here, though, since I don't cook much and she claims to be deathly allergic to everything. Did you know you could be allergic to vinegar but still drink wine? Curious.

I'm thinking seriously about a little overnight trip of my own to a hotel, just to have a day and night to myself. My trip to Iowa City for a friend's baby shower was marred by a raucous wedding taking place in the hotel and bar-goers outside my window all night. So I'm plotting to go to one of the fancy casino hotels in downtown Detroit, where I can get a quiet room and book a prenatal massage and pedicure and manicure or whatever and order room service and then have a giant bed all to myself to toss and turn in while I try to get comfortable enough to pass out for the night. But, there will be no waking up to a whining toddler, no chasing a naked toddler around the house, no convincing a toddler to let the Elmo videos go so we can eat dinner. It's the equivalent of my Vegas trip/golf weekend/etc. I love my kiddo to pieces, but a break is a good thing. KB says he's all for it. So I just have to pick a day. Soon.

Now: play-dough. Make it. It kicks ass.

Homemade Play-dough
Combine in a sauce pan:
  • 1 cup flour
  • 1/3 cup salt
  • 2 teaspoons cream of tartar
  • 1 cup water
  • 1 tablespoon vegetable oil
Stir over low heat until smooth (some lumps are okay) and thickened. Add food coloring and keep stirring until it forms one big clump together around the spoon. This will work out your muscles and wrist, hard. Remove from heat and cool on wax paper. I found it helpful to start kneading right away while warm, to ensure the color is mixed through and any lumps get worked out. Store in an airtight container or ziplock bag. If it gets a little dry just work a little water into it and presto! good as new. It shouldn't spoil due to the salt content. It's supposed to keep longer than store-bought stuff -- we'll see!



Mina said...

Hoarder bowels, huh? Bad. Very. Bad. Hope you're over it.
Happy birthday, Jackson - i'd rather be early than late. And reading and commenting is not easy these days. So, have a blast, sweatheart!
Off to concoct playdoh, as per instructed. :-)
Enjoy your time off. Do wake up to stuff yer face with yummy crap. Over and out.

bunny said...

YES YES YES ABSOLUTELY on the hotel vacation all to yourself. And maaaad props to you for not going all insane with the birthday gifts. I've been privy to like a million conversations lately about how much parents resent having to attend a thousand birthday parties and having to provide gift bags for the kids when its their turn, and it's like DON'T DO IT THEN. Homemade play dough is genius (although...does it smell like playdough?). Can't wait to see the photos.

(Oh, and so sorry about your ass. Brava on the NO ENEMA, THANKS...)